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The Gay Road Less Traveled

The Gay Road Less Traveled

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Menagerie – Rachel Vincent

14 Wednesday Nov 2018

Posted by johnjernigan in Books Check 'Em Out, introducing, My Favorite Things, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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authors, book reviews, books, Carnival, fantasy, fiction, gay, gay authors, gay writers, john jernigan, LGBT, movies, queer, Rachel Vincent, the gay road less traveled, Unicorn, writers

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A compelling, awesome, unique and imaginative story…so different it’s hard to explain, fantastically good!

“There there is breathtaking beauty behind the seamy and grotesque reality of the carnival. Gallagher, her handler, is as kind as he is cryptic and strong. The other “attractions”—mermaids, minotaurs, griffins and kelpies—are strange, yes, but they share a bond forged by the brutal realities of captivity. And as Delilah struggles for her freedom, and for her fellow menagerie, she’ll discover a strength and a purpose she never knew existed.”

“Welcome to the menagerie, where beauty and grace shine from every cage and peek from every shadow. You’ve never seen anything like the exotic wonders within, so keep your eyes open, ladies and gentlemen, because in our world of spectacle and illusion, what you see isn’t always what you get.”

“But if monsters could look like humans, and humans could look like monsters, how could anyone ever really be sure that the right people stood on the outside of all those cages?”

“Drea, why don’t you turn a circle and give us a good look?” the talker said, his chest all puffed out, as if he’d had something to do with making me perform.

“Fuck you,” I said, nice and clear, in spite of my fuller voice, so everyone could hear.

A couple of teens near the back of the crowd laughed, but the mothers scowled and covered their children’s ears.

“Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen,” the talker called with an amiable chuckle. “Most of our exhibits were born and raised in the carnival, and they hear a lot of rough language.”

“Most of our handlers are full of shit,” I added, drawing more laughter from the back of the crowd. “I learned to cuss the same place all of your kids did. In middle school.”

“A wolf will growl to warn you that it’s angry and a bull will paw the ground before charging. Rattlesnakes rattle, cats moan and hiss, and hyenas grunt and cackle. But a man will smile right in your face as he drives a knife into your heart.”

“If you cut off my hands, I’ll write with my feet, and if you cut off my feet, I’ll write with my nose, and if you cut that off, you may as well cut my whole head off, because no matter how you slice and dice me, you can’t control what I think, or what I feel. You can keep me locked up for the rest of my life, however brief that may be. But you will never, ever own me.”

“She won’t serve her dish cold,” the oracle mumbled, almost with giddy joy as chill bumps rose all over her skin. “And two graves won’t be near enough…”

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New Orleans 1997

01 Thursday Feb 2018

Posted by johnjernigan in Books Check 'Em Out, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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book, books, boston terrier, ebook, french bulldog, gay, gay author, gay writer, humor, john jernigan, kindle, LGBT, memoir, new orleans, queer, relationships, the gay road less traveled

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an excerpt from my memoir “The Gay Road Less Traveled”

New Orleans 1997
Dear Diary, we lost Princess Diana this year. At Halloween, lots of the drag queens in New Orleans honored her by dressing up as the beloved princess, that’s what I initially thought, but as I looked closer at their outfits, all of them had blood and tire tracks on their dresses, and one queen had a steering wheel around her neck!

 

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My Book is Published!

23 Tuesday Jan 2018

Posted by johnjernigan in Books Check 'Em Out, John Jernigan, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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author, books, ebook, gay, good reads, john jernigan, LGBT, the gay road less traveled, writer

 

 

 

 

Please go buy The Gay Road Less Traveled on Amazon!

 

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John is Such a Pretty Lady

07 Thursday Jul 2016

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culture, dating, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, Lesbian, LGBT, point of view, queer, relationships, sex, Tampa Bay

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under introducing, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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No Fats No Fems

13 Friday May 2016

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit, Mr. Right, the Flaming Homosexual

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culture, dating, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, point of view, queer, relationships, Tampa Bay

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Or the baby Jesus or Allah or the Buddha or Oprah or Tupac

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Bathtime Anger

20 Monday Jul 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Dogs is People Too, My Heart

≈ 1 Comment

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animals, boston terrier, culture, dogs, french bulldog, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, love, pets

1bae

Cricket and Squeak will lay on the bed and ignore me for a while, and then they’ll be my friends again 🙂

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Rivers Cuomo

20 Monday Jul 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in I Love You Man

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culture, gay, gay blog, john jernigan, LGBT, music, queer, Rivers Cuomo, St. Petersburg Florida, Tampa Bay, Weezer

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John loves Rivers

John Jernigan-Cuomo

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

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Sunchyme for Our Marriage Equality

27 Saturday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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best gay blog, civil rights, dance music, gay, gay culture, gay marriage, Gay Rights, john jernigan, LGBT, marriage equality, queer, Supreme Court, the gay road less traveled

SUNCHYME I wanted to post a feelgood song to celebrate our Marriage Equality, and Sunchyme always makes me happy. For us older folks, you will recognize the hook from the 80’s (Dream Academy’s Life in a Northern Town).

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McDonald’s on the Comeup!

11 Thursday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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Chipotle, cooking, foodie, funny, gay, gourmet, health, healthy eating, humor, john jernigan, lifestyle, McDonalds, St. Petersburg, tampa

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Chipotle has scared McDonald’s and they are really trying to step it up. I took a teenager waiting on her intake to the fancy Mickey D’s on Belcher today. The old white lady took our order and gave us a buzzer and said she would bring the food to us!? We had a seat at a lovely lil 2 top with a cool 70’s design. When the lady brought our food the fries were in this cute little fry basket (that I couldn’t steal with my impressionable youth in tow). They done come up! Was still 10 nuggets for $1.49 though, ya heard? Also, where McRib at? #foodie

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Eyes Without Speaking

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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artist, best gay blog, dating, gay, john jernigan, lifestyle, love, poetry, quotes, relationships, sex, St. Petersburg, tampa, the gay road less traveled

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The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart – St. Jerome

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My Books my preciousss

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Books Check 'Em Out, Dogs is People Too

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authors, book reviews, books, culture, English, gay, john jernigan, lifestyle, literature, reading, St. Petersburg, tampa, the gay road less traveled, writers

14

My trunk has been full of books for 2 months. I was finally able to unpack them, with sadly leaving some behind in Miami. Books are my best friends, after the 2 loves of my life Cricket and Squeak

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MD Oriental Market in Pinellas Park

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in introducing, My Favorite Things

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Asian, best gay blog, Chinese, ethnic cooking, foodie, gay marriage, john jernigan, Mandarin, Oriental Market, perspective, point of view, shopping, St. Petersburg, tampa

19

Wanted criminal Amanda Bott and yours truly discovered this most awesome Asian grocery store in Pinellas Park today, big and clean and full of authentic cool everything ! Goose eggs ($7!) and live fish and shrimp and ALL the ramen. Amanda was just grabbing up things, I was not, due to budgetary constraints and whatnot

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Hello Again Tampa Bay

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Heart, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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animals, best gay blog, boston terrier, children, Chrisbullzfan, dogs, french bulldog, gay, john jernigan, love, pets, St. Petersburg, tampa, Tampa Bay

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My 1st two days back at DFL, so far so good! Lil nugget renditions of Cricket and Possum for my desk

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Kinda Thin Kinda Unhealthy Kinda Greedy

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Heart

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

best gay blog, foodie, funny, gay, healthy eating, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, lifestyle, McDonalds, St. Petersburg, tampa, Wawa

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The good news is I weigh less than 150 pounds. The bad news is my blood pressure is 156 over 108. McDonalds has two bacon egg and cheese biscuits for $3 , which I just inhaled. They didn’t even make a dent in my hunger! I want some ribs…

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Add a large black and white Wawa milkshake, because everybody knows they are fat free and it’s only about 40 calories or something like that

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Discrepancy at the Wawa

10 Wednesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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automotive, best gay blog, cars, french bulldog, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, perspective, point of view, St. Petersburg, tampa

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When I rolled up at the crib this is what I saw. I hope I didn’t drive off with the nozzle and hose still attached. Bet I don’t go back and check though

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My New Boyfriend

02 Tuesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Favorite Things, the Flaming Homosexual

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

best gay blog, foodie, funny, gay, George Clooney, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, queer, Saint Petersburg Florida, Tampa Florida, the gay road less traveled

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My lover brought me dumplings from Hunan Wok, fried hard with extra dipping sauce because he’s all attentive and knows what I like and whatnot. We’re going to eat dumplings and watch a movie (of my choosing). Yes, he bears an uncanny resemblance to George Clooney and No, he is not a fig newton of my imagination. ‪#‎rainbowfignewtons‬

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late Memorial Day Remembrance

02 Tuesday Jun 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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best gay blog, daddy issues, gay, john jernigan, LGBT, love, Memorial Day, perspective, point of view, queer, relationships, the gay road less traveled

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My Pop, Graham Caldwell, a Korean war veteran, and also my father, a Vietnam vet (that I never really knew)

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Here Comes the Sun – Nina Simone

14 Thursday May 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, My Favorite Things, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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best gay blog, gay, gay dating, john jernigan, love, Nina Simone, olivia pope, relationships, scandal, sex, Shonda Rhimes, South Beach Miami

featured in the season finale of Scandal, a great love of mine, Ms. Nina Simone

for Stephen *6/2015 Stephen is a turkey poot

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*UCK *E IN THE *SS TONIGHT

29 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit, the Flaming Homosexual

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

best gay blog, funny, games, gay, gay sex, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, perpspective, point of view, pop culture, the gay road less traveled

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Cricket the Destroyer

23 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Dogs is People Too, My Heart

≈ 1 Comment

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animals, best gay blog, boston terrier.dogs, Cricket the French Bulldog, dating, french bulldog, gay, john jernigan, love, Miami, perspective, pets, relationships, sex

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When it’s a rainy day and the kids are trapped inside with nothing to do…I guess I’m lucky it was a $1 Carebears pillow that I got at the flea market instead of one of the motel’s pillows

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A Beautiful Little Video To Make You Cry

16 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Favorite Things, My Heart

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animals, best gay blog, foodie, gay, happiness, inspirational, john jernigan, love, Luiz Antonio, perspective, point of view, recipes, vegetarian

“I don’t like that they die, I want them to be standing up”

“These animals, you gotta take care of them and not eat them!”

“Why are you crying?”

“I’m just touched by you, you are saying something beautiful”

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Social Work Slave Wages vs. Prostitution

12 Sunday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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best gay blog, crime, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, perspective, prostitution, queer, social worker, the gay road less traveled

9

This $1 box of fruit whirls, $1 bologna and 49 cent potted meat have to last all week!John’s finances are leading him back to the prostitution! straight prostitution obviously ‪#‎nogay4pay‬

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Roll Damn Tide, Alabama’s Got Our Coach!

08 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Heart

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Alabama Crimson Tide, Avery Johnson Alabama basketball, gay, Gregg Popovich, John Calipari, john jernigan, Kentucky Wildcats, Mike Budenholzer, NBA basketball, NCAA basketball, Roll Tide, SEC sports

17

Avery Johnson is from the Gregg Popovich/San Antonio Spurs tree, and I know he will succeed in Tuscaloosa, in Jesus name! A prime example of Pop’s system success is the Atlanta Hawks head coach Mike Budenholzer, the Hawks are in 1st place in the East without a superstar or huge payroll…ROLL DAMN TIDE!

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This Bathtime Thing is Bullshit

08 Wednesday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Dogs is People Too, My Heart

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

animals, boston terrier, Cricket the French Bulldog, dogs, french bulldog, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, Nature, PETA, pets, Squeak the Boston Terrier

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Squeak will ignore me for hours after her bath, she calls it a “civil right’s violation” and “animal cruelty.”

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Nawlins Drink Special

07 Tuesday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit

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best gay blog, french quarter, funny, gay, humor, john jernigan, lifestyle, new orleans, perspective, point of view, relationships, sex, the Marigny

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Hey Mama – David Guetta feat Nicki Minaj & Afrojack

02 Thursday Apr 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in introducing, Music is the Answer

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Afrojack, David Guetta, DJ, EDM, gay, house music, john jernigan, Lesbian, LGBT, Nicki Minaj, pop music, South Beach Miami, Ultra Music Festival

They played the shit out of this at Ultra

Yes I do the cooking
Yes I do the cleaning
Yes I keep the nana real sweet for your eating
Yes you be the (boss) yes I be respecting
Whatever that you tell me cause its the game

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The Adoption Option

21 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in My Favorite Things, My Heart

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adoption, best gay blog, DCF, gay, gay adoption, gay marriage, Gay Rights, john jernigan, lifestyle, perspective, point of view, social worker, South Beach Miami

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I finalized the adoption of my favorite teen this week! I continue to be amazed at the strength and resilience that the children on my caseload have. This teenager has a 4.2 weighted GPA and is going to attend Yale. She has never missed a day of school in her life, despite suffering a childhood of emotional abuse by her mentally ill biological mother. Well she’s adopted now! And they lived happily ever after…

I urge my gay community to look to the foster care system for adoption. Thousands of children are removed from their biological parents following abuse and neglect in the U.S. on a daily basis. I have about 30 kids on my caseload waiting on someone like you to love them. You could be their forever homes and families.

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Point of View – DB Boulevard

20 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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best gay blog, EDM, gay, house music, john jernigan, LGBT, lifestyle, love, perspective, point of view, Point of View - DB Boulevard, queer, relationships

I don’t have a cent
Will I pay my rent?
And even my car doesn’t work
Me and my man?
He’s the one to die for…
We have split up

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Laid – James

14 Saturday Mar 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, the Flaming Homosexual

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best gay blog, gay, john jernigan, Kendall Calling, Laid - James, lifestyle, love, nostalgia, pop culture, queer, South Beach Miami, the 90's, wilton manors

Flashback Friday, to 1993

This bed is on fire with passionate love
The neighbours complain about the noises above
But she only comes when she’s on topMy therapist said not to see you no more
She said you’re like a disease without any cure
She said I’m so obsessed that I’m becoming a bore, oh noAh, you think you’re so pretty…

Caught your hand inside the till
Slammed your fingers in the door
Fought with kitchen knives and skewers
Dressed me up in womens’ clothes
Messed around with gender roles
Line my eyes and call me pretty

Moved out of the house so you moved next door
I locked you out, you cut a hole in the wall
I found you sleeping next to me, I thought I was alone
You’re driving me crazy
When are you coming home?

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Sean Pertwee

13 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in I Love You Man

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Batman, best gay blog, Bruce Wayne, Catwoman, Doctor Who, Fish Mooney, gay, Gotham, john jernigan, Marvel Comics, Robin Lord Taylor, Sean Pertwee, the Penguin

127

Currently playing the role of Alfred to a young Bruce Wayne, parenting the future Batman. Parent me please! John Jernigan-Pertwee

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← Older posts

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Recent Posts

  • The Gay Road Less Traveled March 20, 2020
  • Lost Without You – Freya Ridings February 27, 2020
  • Happy National Boston Terrier Day! February 19, 2020
  • John’s Favorite 1990’s Movies February 18, 2020
  • Johnny’s Favorite Songs of 2018 December 9, 2018

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The Very Inspiring Blogger Award

C.L. Bolin Books & Art: When I get the chance, I love reading John Jernigan’s blog. I’m laughing, homesick, crying and peeing myself all at once.

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The Gay Road Less Traveled

A friend of mine who used to be one of the hard working under appreciated social workers for the State here in Pensacola has written a book now available on Kindle, John Jernigan’s “The Gay Road Less Traveled.” I purchased it tonight to start it, couldn’t out it down, it was so funny. Graphic, real, and hysterical, John’s writing is endearing, funny, smart and if you happen to be drinking coffee, it may shoot out of your nose at some point during one of his vignettes. You can read it on Kindle.

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