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The Gay Road Less Traveled

The Gay Road Less Traveled

Tag Archives: mental health

Chronic Childhood Trauma

12 Tuesday Sep 2017

Posted by johnjernigan in John Jernigan, My Heart, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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adoption, bear, child abuse, Domestic Violence, health, Life, medical, mental health, News, relationships, science, social work, trauma

My class curriculum includes considerable time spent on trauma-informed care and helping my prospective adoptive families succeed in parenting children who have suffered abuse or neglect. I use the example of a Bear in the Woods (at the 8-minute mark in this Ted Talk video on Childhood Trauma by Dr. Nadine Burke Harris).

Significant damage to the emotional and physical health of children who are exposed to high levels of adversity/trauma occurs over time (chronic trauma). They are more likely to engage in high-risk behavior, and to develop heart disease or cancer. Our brains have a stress response system, in the hypothalamic and adrenal glands, that governs our fight or flight response in a situation. Imagine you’re walking in the forest and you see a bear. Immediately, your brain sends a response to your adrenal glands: Release stress hormones! Adrenal! Cortisol! Your heart starts to pound, your pupils dilate, your airways open up, and you are ready to either fight that bear or run from that bear! And that is wonderful, if you are in the forest, with a bear. The problem is what happens when the bear comes home every night, in the form of domestic violence, or physical abuse, or molestation. This system is activated over and over and over again, and it goes from being life-saving to health damaging. Children are especially sensitive to this repeated stress-activation, because their brains and bodies are just developing. High doses of adversity affect their brain structure and function, their developing immune systems and hormonal systems.

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We The Animals – Justin Torres

05 Wednesday Oct 2016

Posted by johnjernigan in Books Check 'Em Out, My Favorite Things, the Flaming Homosexual

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author, book reviews, books, child abuse, fiction, gay, LGBT, literature, memoir, mental health, reading, writer

image“We  wanted more.  We knocked the butt ends of our forks against the table, tapped are spoons against our empty bowls; we were hungry. We wanted more volume, more riots. We turned up the knob on the TV until our ears ached with the shouts of angry men. We wanted more music on the radio; we wanted beats, we wanted rock.  We wanted muscles on our skinny arms. We had bird bones, hollow and light, and we wanted more density, more weight. We were six matching hands, six stomping feet; we were brothers, boys, three little kings locked in a feud for more.

We wanted more flash, more blood, more warmth.

Always more, always hungrily scratching for more. But there were times, quiet moments, when our mother was sleeping, when she hadn’t slept for two days, and any noise, any stair creak, any shut door, any stifled laugh, any voice at all might wake her, those crystal, still mornings, when we wanted to protect her,  this confused goose of a woman, this stumbler, this gusher, with her backaches and headaches and her tired, tired ways, this uprooted Brooklyn creature, this tough talker,  always with tears when she told us she loved us, her mixed up love, her needy love, her warmth, those mornings when sunlight found the cracks in our blinds and laid it self down in crisp strips on our carpet,  those quiet mornings when we’d fix ourselves oatmeal and sprawl onto our stomachs with crayons and paper, with glass marbles that we were careful not to rattle, when  our mother was sleeping, when the air did not smell like sweat or breath or mold, when the air was still and light, those mornings when silence was our secret game and our gift and our sole accomplishment –  we wanted less : less weight, less work, less noise, less father, less muscles and skin and hair. We wanted nothing, just this, just this.”

 

 

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Stealing From Cracker Barrel and Walmart

08 Tuesday Jul 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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atlanta, borderline personality disorder, culture, dating, funny, gay, humor, LGBT, mental health, MSW, queer, relationships, Walmart

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On Sunday, I had a breakfast date with a nice engineer who works at Lockheed Martin, at the Cracker Barrel in Oldsmar. In addition to devouring my country fried steak with white gravy, pancakes and eggs, when my date excused himself to the bathroom I put the salt and pepper shakers in my pocket, all sneaky-like. Full disclosure, I walked out of the Creighton Walmart with a rack of baby back ribs last month as well…but that was basically due to the stupid worker in charge of self checkout ignoring me for way way too long…but what’s going on here, what’s the real, do I need a DSM diagnosis or sumthin’?

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Linda Jernigan Rest in Peace 2/2/1951 – 6/18/14

19 Thursday Jun 2014

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Alabama, atlanta, culture, death and dying, DSM diagnosis, EBTG, gay, Kubler Ross, LGBT, Life and Death, mental health, perspective, point of view

Linda Jernigan Rest in Peace  2/2/1951 - 6/18/14

I pray that your troubled mind is finally at peace

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under My Heart

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Video

Black Box, the new House?

29 Tuesday Apr 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in introducing

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Bi-Polar disorder, Black Box ABC, buy John's book, CBT therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, dating, depression, Ditch Davey, DSM diagnosis, gay, gay dating, House, Hugh Laurie, Jesse Spencer, Kelly Reilly, LGBT, love, Manic Depressive disorder, mental health, Olivia Wilde, perspective, point of view, relationships, sex, Siobhan Williams, tv drama, Vanessa Redgrave

For a few hours yesterday I was flying blissfully high, getting a compliment in court from Judge Moore, smiling and speaking to everyone, confident and optimistic about life. In bed this morning, after calling in sick, my high peak is now a low valley. FML, what if this is as good as it gets? why can’t I find somebody to love me? what’s wrong with me…Last night I watched Black Box, and loved it, identifying with the main character and even seeing some of my Cognitive Behavioral Training in use. Black Box is from the House creative team of writers and producers.

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Charm Uniqueness Nerve Talent

19 Saturday Oct 2013

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boston terrier, dating, depression, DSM, john jernigan, loneliness, lowered expectations, mental health, perspective, relationships, sadness

Charm Uniqueness Nerve Talent

My life is shit right now…broke, lonely, fat, ugly, jaded and pessimistic. I have to remind myself that I have Charm, Uniqueness, Nerve & Talent, what that spells is what I feel like for all of 2013.

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under My Heart

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  • The Gay Road Less Traveled March 20, 2020
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The Very Inspiring Blogger Award

C.L. Bolin Books & Art: When I get the chance, I love reading John Jernigan’s blog. I’m laughing, homesick, crying and peeing myself all at once.

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The Gay Road Less Traveled

A friend of mine who used to be one of the hard working under appreciated social workers for the State here in Pensacola has written a book now available on Kindle, John Jernigan’s “The Gay Road Less Traveled.” I purchased it tonight to start it, couldn’t out it down, it was so funny. Graphic, real, and hysterical, John’s writing is endearing, funny, smart and if you happen to be drinking coffee, it may shoot out of your nose at some point during one of his vignettes. You can read it on Kindle.

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