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The Gay Road Less Traveled

The Gay Road Less Traveled

Tag Archives: Nina Simone

Here Comes the Sun – Nina Simone

14 Thursday May 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, My Favorite Things, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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best gay blog, gay, gay dating, john jernigan, love, Nina Simone, olivia pope, relationships, scandal, sex, Shonda Rhimes, South Beach Miami

featured in the season finale of Scandal, a great love of mine, Ms. Nina Simone

for Stephen *6/2015 Stephen is a turkey poot

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100 Years & Sugar in My Bowl

12 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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dating, Five for Fighting, fort lauderdale, gay blog, LGBT, Miami, Nina Simone, queer, relationships, sex, south beach, Sugar in My Bowl

for Dana

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I Got Life – Nina Simone vs. Everyday – Kim English

20 Saturday Sep 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in My Heart, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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dance music, EDM, fort lauderdale, gay, gay blog, Hed Kandi, house music, Kim English, LGBT, lifestyle, love, Miami, Nina Simone, relationships

Woke up this clear blue morning and I am feeling good. Rather than whining about what I don’t have, look at all I do have: my health, my empathy, my compassion, my books, my education, my capacity to love. Also, the two great loves of my life are cuddled up in bed with me right now.

I Got Life

Ain’t got no mother, ain’t got no culture
Ain’t got no friends, ain’t got no schooling
Ain’t got no love, ain’t got no name
Ain’t got no ticket, ain’t got no token
Ain’t got no God

Then what have I got
Why am I alive anyway?
Yeah, what have I got
Nobody can take away

Got my hair, got my head
Got my brains, got my ears
Got my eyes, got my nose
Got my mouth, I got my smile

I got my tongue, got my chin
Got my neck, got my boobs
Got my heart, got my soul
Got my back, I got my sex

I got my arms, got my hands
Got my fingers, got my legs
Got my feet, got my toes
Got my liver, got my blood

I’ve got life
I’ve got my freedom
I’ve got life

Everyday

When I look around I cannot take for granted
Things given to me the favor I’ve been handed
All the miracles and wonders I have witnessed
I do not guess – I know that I am truly blessed

I must keep the faith, no matter what I’m seeing
‘Cuz that’s the key unlocking or receiving
The impossible taking place in my life
The greatest steps ascending through those higher heights

I got my health, I got my strength, I’m in my right mind
I still have breath so I got hope that love is on my side
And where I go I know I need not look behind me
He keeps me safe and this is something he does everyday

2n3

IMG_0134

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Video

Lilac Wine & Jolene – Miley Cyrus

07 Friday Mar 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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Bangerz tour, buy John's book on Amazon $3.99, dating, Dolly Parton, gay, Jolene, Katy Perry, LGBT, Lilac Wine, love, Miley Cyrus, music, music reviews, Nina Simone, pop culture, relationships, sex, Tampa Bay

Dolly Parton, Nina Simone and Miley Cyrus…three of my favorite people in the world

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Image

Donating My Bodily Fluids or Killing Myself

26 Sunday Jan 2014

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Augusten Burroughs, book reviews, books, buy John's book on Amazon, David Sedaris, ebooks, essays, fort lauderdale, funny, gay, humor, LGBT, Mateo L'artiste, memoirs, Nina Simone, plasma, wilton manors

Donating My Bodily Fluids or Killing Myself

an excerpt from my book, The Gay Road Less Traveled, which I hope to have published in 2016

Ain’t Got No/I Got Life – Nina Simone

On the Monday after Thanksgiving I return to sell plasma at the donation center in Wilton Manors. The center is busy, there are lines of people waiting to check in. Once the donor checks-in, we are called into cubicles to see the not-nurses/screeners, who OK or deny our donation suitability. I get in the queue for the check-in kiosks. 20 minutes later I type my ID # and present my thumbprint, to be scanned into one of the three computer terminals. The screen identifies me, but instead of popping up a screen of 35 questions like “Do you currently reside in a home with an individual who has hepatitis?” the computer screen flashes “Client not appropriate for kiosk, declined. Proceed to special screening intake.” I get in line for the not-nurses, and 10 minutes later, I am sitting in a cubicle with one of the screeners.

“The computer said I wasn’t appropriate to do my questions and that I needed to come see you” I tell the somewhat big-boned not-nurse whose name-tag says “Beatrice.” I am growing a little concerned.

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under Books Check 'Em Out

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Video

introducing Nina Simone

14 Tuesday Jan 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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art, blues, buy John's book on Amazon, classical, culture, dating, folk, gay, gospel, inspirational, jazz, john jernigan, LGBT, love, Montreaux, music, music reviews, new orleans, Nina Simone, R&B, relationships, sex, Tampa Bay

One of my greatest loves, Nina Simone. Favorite of her songs include Sinnerman, Lilac Wine, Ain’t Got No/ I Got Life, Feeling Good, My Baby Just Cares for Me, Mississippi Goddam, I Put a Spell On You, Please Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood and Sugar in My Bowl (which I still want).

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Nina Simone (February 21, 1933 – April 21, 2003) was an American singer, songwriter, pianist, arranger, and civil rights activist widely associated with jazz music. Simone aspired to become a classical pianist while working in a broad range of styles including classical, jazz, blues, folk, R&B, gospel, and pop.Her musical style arose from a fusion of gospel and pop songs with classical music, in particular with influences from her first inspiration, Johann Sebastian Bach and accompanied with her expressive jazz-like singing in her characteristic contralto.

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A civil rights message was standard in Simone’s recording repertoire, becoming a part of her live performances. Simone performed and spoke at many civil rights meetings, such as at the Selma to Montgomery marches.

Simone’s bearing and stage presence earned her the title “High Priestess of Soul.” She was a piano player, singer, and performer, “separately and simultaneously”. On stage, Simone moved from gospel to blues, jazz, and folk, to numbers with European classical styling, and Bach-style fugal counterpoint.

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Video

Lilac Wine – Nina Simone

15 Sunday Dec 2013

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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blues, culture, dating, gay, gay blog, jazz, john jernigan, LGBT, love, music, music reviews, Nina Simone, relationships, sex, soul, Verve remixed

Lilac wine is sweet and heady, like my love
Lilac wine, I feel unsteady, like my love
Listen to me… I cannot see clearly
Isn’t that she coming to me nearly here?
Lilac wine is sweet and heady where’s my love?
Lilac wine, I feel unsteady, where’s my love?
Listen to me, why is everything so hazy?
Isn’t that she, or am I just going crazy, dear?
Lilac Wine, I feel unready for my love…

images

Forbidden-Fruit-Nina-Simone-Album-Cover-nina-simone-16722157-1800-1800

6195304_Nina-Simone

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nina_simone_by_fran2010-d5orymi

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Video

I Got Life – Nina Simone, Carry On – Fun.

22 Wednesday May 2013

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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Carry On -Fun, dance, DJ, gay, Groovefinder, Hair, john jernigan, music, music reviews, Nina Simone, Orlando, relationships, sex, St. Petersburg

These two songs have been my anthems these last few months, I’ve been through some depression and hard times, but I’ve got life and I’m carrying on…

I ain’t got no home, ain’t got no shoes
Ain’t got no money, ain’t got no class
Ain’t got no skirts, ain’t got no sweater
Ain’t got no perfume, ain’t got no beer
Ain’t got no man

Ain’t got no mother, ain’t got no culture
Ain’t got no friends, ain’t got no schooling
Ain’t got no love, ain’t got no name
Ain’t got no ticket, ain’t got no token
Ain’t got no God

Then what have I got
Why am I alive anyway?
Yeah, what have I got
Nobody can take away

Got my hair, got my head
Got my brains, got my ears
Got my eyes, got my nose
Got my mouth, I got my smile

I got my tongue, got my chin
Got my neck, got my boobs
Got my heart, got my soul
Got my back, I got my sex

I got my arms, got my hands
Got my fingers, got my legs
Got my feet, got my toes
Got my liver, got my blood

I’ve got life
I’ve got my freedom
I’ve got life

I’ve got life
And I’m gonna keep it
I’ve got life
And nobody’s gonna take it away

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Video

Ain’t Got No, I Got Life – DJ Supreme John Jernigan

25 Thursday Apr 2013

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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Alabama Shakes, andre frauenstein, culture, dance music, DJ, emeli sande, fun., gay, Jeff Ralls, john jernigan, LGBT, new orleans, Nina Simone, sex, south Florida, vocal house

For Jeff Ralls, my future ex-husband

Next to Me – Emeli Sande
Carry On – Fun.
The A-Team – Ed Sheeran
Ho Hey – The Lumineers
Chasing Pavements – Adele
Lilac Wine – Nina Simone
Hold On – Alabama Shakes
Late at Night – Buffalo Tom
Somebody’s Baby – Jackson Browne
Just Like Heaven – The Cure
Somewhere Only We Know – Keane
Sunrise – Simply Red
Pandora’s Box – OMD
Blue Savannah – Ersaure
Something About You – Live Element
Con Te Partiro – Donna Summer
Just the Way You Are – Milky
Peace in the Valley – Sabrina Johnston
Point of View – DB Boulevard
Stoned in Love – Chicane
Loving You More – BT
I Got Life – Nina Simone
Call on Me – Eric Prydz
Bridge Over Troubled Water – Hannah Jones
The Gift – Way Out West
Disappear – Andre Frauenstein

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Video

Sinnerman – Nina Simone

16 Wednesday Jan 2013

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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art, culture, favorites, Felix da Housecat, gay, gay fort lauderdale, inspirational, john jernigan, LGBT, new orleans, Nina Simone, point of view, Sinnerman, south Florida

Lilac_Wine_by_butterflywing50 nina_simone_in_ms_paint_by_3208-d2znerq music_is_a_gift_by_charletbrown-d39raxg nina_by_keepfrozenthissideup-d3djsuk Nina_Simone_09_by_Bochud Nina_Simone__s_Amaing_Lips____by_Mensaman nina_simone_by_chien4philosofique nina_simone_by_daturadatura-d4amad8 nina_simone_by_fran2010-d5orymi Nina_Simone_by_maddwitch Nina_Simone_by_resqben nina_simone_by_risa694-d5cyrm9 nina_simone_by_tesch-d40gd4c nina_simone_by_touchmyart 111111 11111111 11113 6195304_Nina-Simone Forbidden-Fruit-Nina-Simone-Album-Cover-nina-simone-16722157-1800-1800 Nina_Simone_Please_Dont_Let_Me_Be_Misunderstood images

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Selling My Bodily Fluids or Killing Myself

30 Friday Nov 2012

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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culture, dating, fort lauderdale, gay, HIV, humor, Nina Simone, plasma, sex, wilton manors

On the Monday after Thanksgiving I returned to sell plasma around 2 p.m. The center is busy, there are lines of people waiting to check in and to see the not-nurses/screeners who OK or deny our donation suitability. I get in the queue for the check-in kiosks. 20 minutes later I type my ID # and present my thumbprint to be scanned  into one of the three kiosk computer terminals. The screen identifies me, but instead of popping up a screen of 35 questions like “Do you currently reside in a home with an individual who has hepatitis?” the computer screen flashes “Client not appropriate for kiosk, declined. Proceed to XYZ intake.” I get in line for the not-nurses. 10 minutes later, I am sitting in a cubicle with one of the screeners.

“The computer said I wasn’t appropriate to do my questions and that I needed to come see you” I tell the somewhat big-boned not-nurse whose name-tag says “Beatrice.” * I am growing a little concerned.

Beatrice: Uh-Huh

Me: What does that mean?

Beatrice: Scan your thumb for me

Beatrice looks at her screen, grunts, scrolls down, squints, types something

Beatrice: Belinda*, come look at this

Belinda, who is also larger, walks up and looks at the screen

Beatrice: He has to see the MSF, right?

Belinda: Yep, sure does

I am studying the two women’s faces during this exchange, looking for a clue of some kind, what does that screen say about me? Am I sick? What’s wrong? What’s a MSF?

Beatrice: Mr. Jernigan, I also notice the large bruise on your arm

Me: Yeah, Shaquana did that the last time I came to donate.

Beatrice: Well I have to tell them you have it, you understand?

Beatrice: Lavon!* Come look at this bruise

Lavon floats over. He is wearing perfume of some flavor, not cologne…definitely perfume

Lavon: Girl he looks fine, he can donate…you see the bruise is all yellow colored, that means it  ain’t new

Shante Sashay Away!

Beatrice: Ok Mr. Jernigan, you have to see the MSF. Go to the back waiting room and someone will call you

I make my way to the back of the building to another waiting area, where almost all the seats are full. On this day I am wearing a short-sleeve pink Polo shirt. In 2010 or 1999 I had the confidence to wear pink without worry or concern, as pink makes a statement and draws attention when a man wears it, all good. In this nomenclature on this day, the brothers around me apparently weren’t feeling the pink. Lavon is at the counter talking all loud about the club they had went to and how fine the the men were. One of the men sitting directly across from me looks directly at me as he is listening to Lavon. He says to the man seated to my left “I ain’t got no time for this faggot bullshit. ” The man next to me agrees that he doesn’t have time for it either. I roll my eyes and tune them out.

So I’m sitting and waiting. I slowly but steadily get more and more stressed out. I know my ears are bright red. I am rehashing what just happened, my kiosk denial, Beatrice’s facial expressions when she pulled me up on her computer, Belinda’s matter-of-fact appraisal of what had to be done with me.

What if I’m sick, HIV positive? Or have Hepatitis, or Lupus, or Polio?  West Nile? Trichinosis? Cancer? Heartworms? Cat Scratch Fever? I hate ignorant cats

What would I do if this MSF person told me I was HIV-positive? (Deep down I know it’s not a possibility, I have never ever had unsafe sex, except with my ex) but I have been one notch below suicidal for months now, depressed, unhappy, no energy…shuffling along, head down, pessimistic. That’s with the understanding that I was healthy, in body if not spirit. Would I kill myself? How would I do it? Sleeping pills and a walk into the ocean…leap from a tall building…one of those two definitely. I only have a few sleeping pills though…I would have to schedule a Dr.’s visit  to have my new guy write a script, the office visit will cost money, getting the script filled will cost and I probably couldn’t get an appointment for a week or two…

What happens to my babies if I overdose in the tub? I could dump out a whole bag of dog food in the living room for them. No, Squeak would freak out once she figured out something was wrong. I could board them at a doggie daycare, putting my ex’s name & contact info down for them and send him an email to come down and get them I guess…I just don’t have the strength or willingness to persevere if I’m sick…My ears are ringing, brain is buzzing, I feel nauseous, sick…my life  is kinda flashing before my eyes.

Back to reality, I realize I have been zoned out, sitting and waiting for like 20 more minutes.  I walk up to the desk and get a worker’s attention. Kamil is tall, light-skinned and most importantly is wearing a white jacket. I assume he is a mysterious MSF.

Me: Could you please look at my info? The kiosk said I was inappropriate to donate and Beatrice sent me back here to see an MSF. I’m really stressed out and worried that something’s wrong …

Kamil looks me up in his computer.

Kamil : Ah man, no need to stress. The worker who created your donor profile didn’t put the color of your tattoos in the descriptive, that’s all

I am immediately relieved and grateful that I am Ok, I have just been put through the ringer and my ears are pulsing red, but I am not sick, I’m not faced with having to kill myself, everything’s looking up. Kamil gives me a smirk, clicks on something on the screen and sends me back to Beatrice to be screened. Shante you stay!

I’m still a nervous wreck when I sit down with Beatrice

Me: You know I was really scared and worried, this whole time I thought something was really wrong with me

Beatrice: I didn’t know it was about your tattoos, the computer didn’t tell me what, just that you had been flagged

Beatrice checks my temperature, 98.2,  and then takes my blood pressure. It’s 140/108

Beatrice: Your pressure is too high, the lower # has to be below 100

Me: My pressure is up because I kind of went through a nervous breakdown here this last hour, I can feel my heart thudding in my chest still

Beatrice: Why don’t you go sit back down and calm down, then come back to me in about 15

Me: I really don’t have the time, I’m kinda at work, I’ve been here like an hour and it takes 45 minutes to get the plasma out of me, can you recheck my pressure or something?

Beatrice: I’ll go ahead and check your blood while we wait then

Beatrice proceeds to poke my left index finger and squeeze a small vial of blood out. She then puts the vial in her little shake-it-up machine to get tested

Beatrice, looking at the results a minute later: Oh you can’t donate today anyway. Your blood says it is 9.1, it has to be between 3.8 and 9.0.

Me: Why is it high? What’s the cause?

Beatrice: Your blood is too rich today, like too thick. What you had for lunch?

Me: Pollo

Beatrice: You ate real good on Thanksgiving?

Me: A lot of fast food and ice cream mainly, all weekend

Beatrice: Yeah, that’s it. Next time eat a Subway or something before you come to donate. You can come back tomorrow, Have a Blessed Day

I am dismissed. No donation, no $50,  nerves is bad, new wrinkles have materialized in the last hour, more grey hair created as I went through this ordeal. I’m not sure if I should be happy or sad. I just wasted almost 2 hours and more troubling I had worked through and rationalized killing myself  if things went a different direction. I’m not sick though, not positive…still don’t have a positive outlook on life unfortunately.

As often happens when stressed or overloaded or mentally taxed, I am repetitively hearing and singing along with a song in my head, over and over again, won’t go away

Today it’s apropos and fitting and I’m sure my subconscious dug this song out: I’m hearing Nina Simone’s “I Got Life” which I am reminded that I still have…

* not their real names

aablood_parts

plasma

aalife

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A Little Sugar in My Bowl – Nina Simone

02 Friday Nov 2012

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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favorites, gay, inspirational, music, Nina Simone, perspective, point of view, sex

I want a little sugar
in my bowl
I want a little sweetness
down in my soul
I could stand some lovin’
Oh so bad
feel so lonely and I feel so sad

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Ain’t Got No….I Got Life Nina Simone

18 Thursday Oct 2012

Posted by johnjernigan in Music is the Answer

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art, culture, favorites, gay, inspirational, music, Nina Simone, perspective, point of view

I got my hair, I got my head
I got my brains, I got my ears
I got my eyes, I got my nose
I got my mouth, I got my smile
I got my tongue, I got my chin
I got my neck, I got my boobs

I got my heart, I got my soul
I got my back, I got my sex
I got my arms, I got my hands
I got my fingers, got my legs
I got my feet, I got my toes
I got my liver, got my blood

I’ve got life , I’ve got my freedom
I’ve got the life

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A friend of mine who used to be one of the hard working under appreciated social workers for the State here in Pensacola has written a book now available on Kindle, John Jernigan’s “The Gay Road Less Traveled.” I purchased it tonight to start it, couldn’t out it down, it was so funny. Graphic, real, and hysterical, John’s writing is endearing, funny, smart and if you happen to be drinking coffee, it may shoot out of your nose at some point during one of his vignettes. You can read it on Kindle.

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