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The Gay Road Less Traveled

The Gay Road Less Traveled

Tag Archives: Walmart

A Romantical Valentine’s Day and whatnot

15 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, the Flaming Homosexual

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best gay blog, culture, funny, gay, gay dating, humor, john jernigan, LGBT, queer, romance, South Beach Miami, Valentine's Day, Walmart

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I gets mine, ya heard?

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John’s Super Walmarks Diet

09 Monday Feb 2015

Posted by johnjernigan in Funny Shit, My Favorite Things, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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best gay blog, Chef, cuisine, culinary, diet, fine dining, foodie, funny, gay, health food, humor, john jernigan, recipes, Walmart

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What to do when you got budgetary constraints but you still want to be all healthy and green and whanot: follow John’s Walmark meal plan for sexual stamina and good teeth and skrong muscles, like Jameis ! #foodie #aintthispaleo?

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Stealing From Cracker Barrel and Walmart

08 Tuesday Jul 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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atlanta, borderline personality disorder, culture, dating, funny, gay, humor, LGBT, mental health, MSW, queer, relationships, Walmart

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On Sunday, I had a breakfast date with a nice engineer who works at Lockheed Martin, at the Cracker Barrel in Oldsmar. In addition to devouring my country fried steak with white gravy, pancakes and eggs, when my date excused himself to the bathroom I put the salt and pepper shakers in my pocket, all sneaky-like. Full disclosure, I walked out of the Creighton Walmart with a rack of baby back ribs last month as well…but that was basically due to the stupid worker in charge of self checkout ignoring me for way way too long…but what’s going on here, what’s the real, do I need a DSM diagnosis or sumthin’?

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Video

People of Walmart

04 Saturday Jan 2014

Posted by johnjernigan in My Favorite Things

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art, Birmingham, culture, different, drag queen, fashion, funny, gay, humor, inspirational, jokes, LGBT, Pensacola, sex, Tampa Bay, Walmart

My baby daddy is in here

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WWJD ?

23 Wednesday Oct 2013

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Cricket the French Bulldog, crime, gay, john jernigan, LGBT, queer, Squeak the Boston Terrier, St. Petersburg, Tampa Bay, Walmart, what would John do, WWJD

WWJD ?

Out on a stroll with my bitches this afternoon (not the stroll, not going back to jail), I spy a Walmart shopping cart just leaning all nonchalant against a tree. I want it. I gots to have it. I put Cricket and Squeak in it and start pushin’ down 1st Ave. to the crib. The cart is rattling, real real loud, on the sidewalk. Some old black men sitting on a front porch laugh and yell at me, but I don’t care. I turn the corner onto 26th and it’s all good. There’s another problem though. Across the street from my place is a car wash and a Jamaican restaurant. The brothers are sitting out in front of their shops. I am not pushing my cart down Central past all of them, so they can laugh at me, especially those Jamaican cats. “Every ting criss, batty boy” I can hear it already. I push my treasure to my apartment’s back alley, and drag it up three flights of outer stairs. It’s real, real heavy. Then it’s done, I’m safe, I have bettered myself, I’m richer! I have a Walmart shopping cart that I will put my underwear and socks and sex toys in…it’s probably a misdemeanor crime at least, huh? Ya’ll ain’t bout dis life

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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Video

Humanity’s Greed

18 Sunday Aug 2013

Posted by johnjernigan in My Heart, Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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China, Community, culture, gay, john jernigan, Life, Nature, News, Review, Sprituality, St. Petersburg, Walmart

CONSUMPTION

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Ooey Gooey Paula Deen

06 Saturday Jul 2013

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gay, john jernigan, LGBTQ, Malibu's Most Wanted, Ooey Gooey Butter Cake, Paula Deen, St. Petersburg, Tampa Bay, Walmart

Ooey Gooey Paula Deen

Walmart Paula Deen I have known, specifically her Ooey Gooey Butter Cake. For a minute I was all panicked that Paula’s train wreck of racism might affect my refined palate if Walmart dropped her, but who am I kidding? Just about everything in Walmart except food comes from China, and I have heard from a reliable source that Walmart is about to roll out a very affordable line of Chinese babies (live, female babies). I do invest in four original ooey gooey butter cakes just in case, and spend this fabulous Saturday night eating them in bed watching Malibu’s Most Wanted and reruns of Big Bang 😦

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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My Walmart Cuisine

10 Monday Jun 2013

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foodie, funny, gay, humour, john jernigan, LGBT, St. Petersburg, Walmart

My Walmart Cuisine

I got paid today, unfortunately I just had to deposit the check…Regions wouldn’t give me any cash from it because I was in the negative…and I was so Hongry. I had $2.38 in silver and $1.16 on my credit card, I bought chili ($1.50) and bbq Vienna sausages ($.53) with my cash, and a 4-pack of chocolate cupcake pudding on my credit card for $1. I got some ritz crackers at the crib…a fine-dining three-course culinary extravaganza…

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Posted by johnjernigan | Filed under Please Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

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  • The Gay Road Less Traveled March 20, 2020
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C.L. Bolin Books & Art: When I get the chance, I love reading John Jernigan’s blog. I’m laughing, homesick, crying and peeing myself all at once.

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The Gay Road Less Traveled

A friend of mine who used to be one of the hard working under appreciated social workers for the State here in Pensacola has written a book now available on Kindle, John Jernigan’s ā€œThe Gay Road Less Traveled.ā€ I purchased it tonight to start it, couldn’t out it down, it was so funny. Graphic, real, and hysterical, John’s writing is endearing, funny, smart and if you happen to be drinking coffee, it may shoot out of your nose at some point during one of his vignettes. You can read it on Kindle.

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